As I was pondering what to contribute to Writers Vineyard this month, I remembered a visit with a new author I had a couple of days ago. She called and wanted me to come to her house so she could pick my brains over the joys and heartaches of having a novel published.
The joy was self-evident with the bubbling pride I observed while she told me of her success with sales and her new experiences. I caught the catch in her throat when she asked how I deal with close friends and relatives showing little interest, not only in purchasing a freshly minted novel or attending launches, but also in never asking about the work involved with such a production.
For whatever reasoning they follow, the end result of having people close to you ignore your creativity HURTS. I like to think it isn’t intentional and after so many novels behind me I tend to compartmentalize the sadness, but as I admitted to her that on occasion the door opens a crack and the gremlins shoot out to prick and prod. While I have great support from most everyone I know, which is encouraging, I realize others aren't so fortunate. I’d be interested in hearing how other authors deal with this. Carol McPhee
9 comments:
Yep, I hear ya.
My MOM isn't interested in Breach Of Trust, my first novel (out in a week and a half... yikes).
Why? Because it is a contemporary. She told me she doesn't read contemporaries. If I wrote a historical, maybe then she'd let me buy her a copy.
I had to laugh at that. That's my Mom, telling it like it is.
That would really hurt me if it were my Mom. On second thought I'd love for her to be here to know what I've accomplished whether she liked it or not. lol. Carol
I've known my Mom my whole life. (grinning) She has never believed in "pity votes." Ya gotta earn her support, daughter or not.
Plus (or maybe 'cause) I've got rhino skin.
The biggest problem I have had isn't with relations expressing little interest (some do, some don't) but with the cliquish folks who run some of the SF conventions in town. Still lots of resistance to anyone coming from a small press.
Most of my friends and family are supportive. Heck, I already received a paid order for my next book that doesn't come out until May 1. I can live with indifference, but not with those who refer to my writing as my "hobby". That drives me nuts. At least respect my writing for what it is--work (that I happen to love, but still...)
Linda Rettstatt
www.geocities.com/lindarettstatt
Interesting post, Carol. I just read a thread on a writers forum about the same thing. I to have been surprised at the lack of interest from most family/friends, with the exception of my sister who was tickled to pieces. Plus, they have no idea of the time involved to create an enveloping story, or the dozens of rewrites. They figure it just happens at the snap of a finger. This facet of writing as been a complete surprise to me.
Big Mike
Interesting post, Carol. I just read a thread on a writers forum about the same thing. I to have been surprised at the lack of interest from most family/friends, with the exception of my sister who was tickled to pieces. Plus, they have no idea of the time involved to create an enveloping story, or the dozens of rewrites. They figure it just happens at the snap of a finger. This facet of writing as been a complete surprise to me.
Big Mike
I can honestly say, the majority of my family, as did many friends, turned out for my first book signing. My family hosted a dinner afterwards and presented me with a large basket of flowers. They were all so proud and supportive. It was very touching. That said, there are still a few members who are indifferent.
When I first started writing, my mother-in-law said, "You'll never get that book published." She didn't intend it to be mean, but her life was one of basics, never doing anything different or shooting for that dream. I decided then, I'd show her. After it was published, she was thrilled for me.
I think the indifference can be a prod for us to keep writing and prove that we've got what it takes to produce that next novel.
Linda
I think I hit a spot that brought out interesting comments. lol. At least as authors we appreciate the work we all do. That's a great consolation and good reason for belonging to a group that is supporting. Carol
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