In the spirit of our love of words, I'm going to try to think up some unusual oxymorons. Everyone's heard of jumbo shrimp, but have you thought about these?1. Genuine Imitation Naugahyde - I imagine a herd of naugas roaming the plains, sporting a variety of pleather pelts.
2. Clean Fill - It's dirt, isn't it?
3. Daily Special - What's so special about it if it's served every day?
4. Gourmet Hamburger - What's the big deal? It's a ground up cow slapped between two slices of bread.
5. Same Difference - I'm sorry, but I HATE that expression.
6. Going Nowhere - Uh, that's just standing still, isn't it?
7. Head Butt - Where exactly is the head?
8. Legally Drunk - Either you're drunk or you're not.
9. Low-Rise - 'Nuff said.
10. Veggie Dogs - Ew.
11. Numb Feeling - I guess we writers had better avoid this one.
12. Pet Cat - Oh, no... he's not the pet, he's the master.
13. Poor Little Rich Girl - Yeah, right.
Photo: No naugas were harmed in the making of this chair.
